اس کے منہ سے وہ الفاظ نکلتے ہی محفل میں موجود تمام افراد خاموش ہو گئے۔ وہ معصوم نظروں سے ان سب کو دیکھ رہی تھی اور شاید یہ اندازہ کرنا چاہ رہی تھی کہ کہیں اس نے کوئی غلط بات نہ کہہ دی ہو۔ عثمان اس کی کیفیت کو بھانپ چکا تھا اور یہ جانتا تھا کہ اگر سب اسکو یوں ہی گھورتے رہے تو اس کی آنکھوں سے آنسو ٹپکنے میں دیر نہیں لگے گی۔ اسی لیے اس نے ہنس کر محفل کا رخ واپس 'دست صبا' کی طرف موڑ دیا۔ قندیل نے اس کی طرف ممنون نظروں سے دیکھا اور پھر دونوں اپنے اپنے حلقے میں گفتگو میں مگن ہو گئے۔ یہ ان کی پہلی اور آخری ملاقات تھی۔ // stories that could have been
Honey. When she asked you your favourite colour you said it was the colour of lightning. When you love you love so much it hurts to keep it in. It's bursting out of you in streams and as tears. My love, this is not weakness. This is strength in it's highest form - to let yourself feel with such intensity. I am weakness, I am fear. I tremble in the face of confrontation. But you, my angel, you are rainbows and beauty and strength. You are the colour of lightning. You are bright red love, bleeding love, heartwarming love. You are light, and light, and light.
I wish I could walk next to a river for the rest of my life. Until my feet bleed or I die of hunger or heartbreak or both. This isn't what 19 is supposed to feel like. // excerpt from an unfinished series
You need time to reconnect with what you came from. Go to natural history exhibits, science museums, buy star charts. Listen to the universe. Listen to the stars calling you home. Science is beautiful if you let it be. There are few things more amazing than finally understanding. My sentences are not coherent today. But in the wise words of Spock, the only emotion I wish to convey is gratitude. Thank you for letting me have this, albeit briefly. Thank you for what I have and what I don't. Thank you.
Found so many wonderful things while cleaning out my desk today; including this stack of letters all written by @fatima_zubairr. I also found two birthday cards that she wrote to me and a few leave applications that we wrote on each other's behalf and I just sat here staring at all of this for a few minutes. I can't believe it's been so long since we were in school together, yar. I might be invisible for extended periods of time, but know that I love you and I miss you. Behnon ko kon bhool sakta hai? ❤
Make A Dream fundraiser was a success, Alhamdulillah. All credit to the wonderful team who organized everything and worked late into the night making sure things went well. You're the best! I wasn't very present this time but I hope I can be of more use next time in sha Allah. // For those of you who don't know: KAC raises funds every year for the kids in paediatric oncology in Mayo Hospital. The funds are used to buy gifts for the children and the team spends a day with them. It's just one of all the wonderful things KAC is doing here. Happy to be a small part of this. May we continue to do better every year. Alta Pete.
Lazy days and muffled laughter. I am surrounded by good things and I am learning not to take it for granted. I am learning that it's okay to be lost sometimes; because you may not have the answer today, but you have the power to go get it. This is why it's important to keep walking. I look at the sky and see nothing but it no longer scares me. I have learned to make peace with my doubt. To work with my doubt. To live despite my doubt. Alhamdulillah today and always.
A list of things: ▪ Manto ▪ A man with no legs ▪ Ward rotations ▪ Crude nicknames ▪ Accidentally hurting someone's feelings ▪ A girl who can't read but smiles a lot ▪ Fundraisers ▪ Surprise parties ▪ You.